It's been a while.

It's been a while. Months since I last placed an entry here.
In the dead of the night, where the only sound left is me furiously typing away on the keyboard and the chirping buzz of a cricket, here I am, sleep deprived post night-shift and yet pretty much awake due to an overdose of caffeine from dinner with the girls earlier. And so it was confirmed. But still, I can't believe it. It feels unreal and I am in denial. Perhaps I never really accepted the fact. Perhaps I just chose not to accept. In the months to come will I learn to accept? Perhaps? Maybe it will soon become a must. I will HAVE to accept it as it is. It's a reality. Not that it isn't now. But it's just a reality I prefer to run away from and deny. Pretend it all never happened. Life goes on whether I like it or not.
On a different note, I think I need to look for a travel companion. I want to go away to some where far for my 2 weeks leave in end of august. Sad to say, I have no one to go with and no idea where exactly I want to go to. The only thing I know is that I want to escape. Escape from this reality of life, even if it's only for a short period of 2 weeks. And maybe, just maybe, I will be able to find some peace and accept anything in life more readily.
For now, I just want to go roll in my bed, grab my book and hope that sleep will eventually find me.